My dad was 'different' today. No better, no worse, just different. He was more 'awake' than the last couple of days, but his mind seemed almost child-like. I'm sure that is a result of the strokes. Two or three times, when I would sit on the bed beside him, and tell him who it was, he would try to reach up and hug me and chuckle or smile really big. One time he said 'it's you' with a smile. We fed him liquids with a spoon - a few drops of Gatorade, coke, water and watermelon juice. I washed his face with a warm cloth, and he seemed to like that.
He also had lots of visitors. Besides my mom and me, there was his youngest sister, his oldest and best friend and his wife, and a family who used to live 2 houses up from them. Sometimes he would know folks, sometimes he wouldn't.
I lost it so bad one time, I had to go sit outside to try to get control of my emotions. My aunt came while I was out there, and I told her I was thinking of getting my Trikke out of the car and ride in the parking lot - I needed to do something physical. She told me to do that, and I did. I had a nice ride in the parking lot and around the sidewalks. I even got some interest in my 'machine'. It did make me feel better, too, and better able to cope when I went back inside.
I've made a new friend there at the hospice house. She is a patient, and her name is Evelyn. She is so sweet, very child-like, and she has a baby doll she just loves on all the time. I stop and chat with her from time to time, and she's so funny. This afternoon she wanted to know where I was going and I told her outside to sit in the sun for a while. I said it was too cold in there and she said "ain't that the truth", and just laughed! Another time she looked up at me and said "is it you, is it really you?" and I said it's me, Becky and she smiled and said "oh yes, Becky". I look forward to my chats with her when she is sitting out in the hallway.
Each day is different in some way. Some better, some worse, some more emotional than others. Tomorrow my aunt is going to take my mama home so she can pick up some things she needs, and a neighbor is bringing her back when she comes to visit my dad after work. While she is gone, I am going to come home and just crash for a while. I really need a couple of hours at home alone to decompress and de-stress, and maybe even vegetate on the sofa for a while. I love my mama, but it will be nice to have a little time alone, and she understands that completely. It will be a nice break for both of us.
Thanks - as always - for your prayers and encouraging words. Hugs and kisses to you all, Becky